Q&A: Maguindanao Gov. Esmael Mangudadatu

Dateline.ph sat down for an interview with Maguindanao Gov. Esmael “Toto” Mangudadatu at Access Point bar on Sct. Borromeo, Quezon City, on Nov. 18, during a poetry reading and music jam leading up to the National Union of Journalists of the Philippines’ commemoration of the second anniversary of the Maguindanao Massacre in which 58 people were brutally slain in what has been called the “single deadliest event for journalists in history.” Here is the transcript of that interview.

DATELINE.PH: It has been almost two years since the Maguindanao massacre and there is still no resolution to the case – it is still a string of hearings so far. How are you bearing up?

Mangudadatu: It is very hard to keep going. I keep seeing my wife’s body. She bore 17 bullet wounds and they had hacked her down her back from her neck to past her waist. Binaril siya sa ari (she was shot in the vagina). She was pregnant. I lost a wife and a child to this brutality. It is very hard on me to remember these things, but I cannot and I will not forget them. Justice is so slow, but I know that keeping the story alive, reminding the people that this terrible thing happened, it is what is ensuring that the process of getting justice for the slain continues, no matter how slow it may be.

DATELINE.PH: So how do you cope with the loss and the pain?

Mangudadatu: Nananampalataya ako (I cling to my faith). I pray five times a day. I do my best to live my faith, to ask God for the strength and the will to go on fighting for justice, to go on serving the people of Maguindanao. To go on being a father to my eight children. I look to my children. They already lost their mother and I cannot just wither and die. I cannot lose hope or faith. I am the only parent they have left. Where would they be if I, too, gave up? There were times that I contemplated dying, but I reminded myself that my children needed me, they still need me and I must be strong for them.

I also still undergo counseling sessions with the rest of the victims’ families. My children undergo counseling, too. It gives us strength and comfort and makes me more determined to push for justice for the slain, to fix the problems I can in Maguindanao.

DATELINE.PH: How are you helping your children cope with the loss of their mother?

Mangudadatu: I make sure they continue their counseling sessions. I remind them to pray five times a day, to let their faith be their source of strength. I work very hard to be their guide and to be their source of comfort. Despite what has happened, it is my duty as a father to make sure my children grow up to be good people. Part of that (job) is to make sure they are given the fortitude and strength to be good people. Part of that (job) is to be a supportive and loving father who helps them heal their hurts as much as I can.

DATELINE.PH: What part of the Qu’ran did you draw the most comfort from? What tenet of faith gets you through the day?

Mangudadatu: (Gestures, his hand sweeping about the room) There is a part of the Qu’ran that says all this is temporary, that all things will return to God, who is the maker of all things and the owner of all things. Knowing that there will be an end, that we will all return to God, this gives me comfort and strength. I know that when I am done, I will be with my wife and child again in God.

DATELINE.PH: You ran for governor as an independent and against the repeated warnings of the Ampatuan family. What motivated you to do this?

Mangudadatu: They were killing people brutally – if you will remember the chainsaw massacre in Maguindanao, then you will understand this. I could not just stand by while they committed atrocities like that. Our province is poor and there were no development efforts. Health care was non-existent. Education was neglected. I did not want this for my province and I could not stand by and let this continue. I had to do something. Running for governor was the action I chose.

DATELINE.PH: It has been reported that your wife went in your stead to file your certificate of candidacy at the Comelec office in Shariff Aguak town. Would you please tell me the circumstances that led up to that?

Mangudadatu: My father had advised me to seek support for my candidacy with my friends in Manila. I had a meeting with some people about my candidacy just before I was due to file (it). I was supposed to accompany the (convoy) and my wife (smiles sadly, looks down at the table and pauses), my wife told me that if I was not at the meeting place by 9:00 a.m., they would go without me. I missed the convoy.

DATELINE.PH: What did you feel when you found out about the ambush on the convoy?

Mangudadatu: Mabaliw-baliw ako. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang nararamdaman ko. Galit. Takot. (I was going mad. I did not know what I was feeling anymore. Anger. Fear.)

DATELINE.PH: Forgiveness is also a tenet of your faith. Have you forgiven the perpetrators of the massacre?

Mangudadatu: (Shakes his head, purses his lips.) No. It is so hard to forgive. Especially when there is no justice delivered. Many of the killers were high on drugs when they committed the massacre. They were merciless. They mutilated the victims. My wife had the most number of bullet holes in her body and a deep hack wound down her back from her neck. They killed my wife and my unborn baby. The families of the slain, my family included, continues to suffer loss and the lack of justice. No, I have not forgiven them.

DATELINE.PH: It has been said that the Magudadatu and Ampatuan clans are related by blood. Is this true?

Mangudadatu: (shaking his head emphatically) No. It is not true. We are not related by blood. There were intermarriages, but there is no blood tie between our families.

DATELINE.PH: You foreswore rido (blood feud) with the Ampatuan clan. Not all of the members of the Ampatuan clan are suspects. Have you reached out to them, to reconcile any family differences?

Mangudadatu: No, I haven’t. If they come to me to seek peace, I will speak with them. But I have not and will not actively seek them out.

DATELINE.PH: You’ve won the gubernatorial race. You are governor of one of the poorest provinces of the country. What are your priority actions in a place where so much need is so rampant?

Mangudadatu: Education. It has been so neglected. I have a mobile schoolroom going. We are bringing in the teachers we need. We have a mobile library. Education is one of the tenets of Islam and it is where we began. Education is necessary to creating peace.

We are also working on improving the health care access and quality in Maguindanao. You cannot be educated if you are sick, if your health is bad. We are working on getting the health centers properly staffed and stocked and we are working with the hospitals and the Department of Health to provide the maximum possible access to health care.

Everything else – livelihood, economic growth, security – is also a prime concern. My office is an open office. I work with my people hands-on. We tackle the problems as best we can, in the short term as we plan for the long term.

DATELINE.PH: Two years of trials later, are you hopeful that justice will be served?

Mangudadatu: I am placing my faith in God, that God will be there to make sure justice is served. I am keeping up my end of the work by continuing my fight for justice. You don’t just get justice in this country because it is your right. You get justice by fighting for it, by going through the process to obtain it.

DATELINE.PH: What can the ordinary Filipino, your everyday Juan, do to help you get justice for the victims of the Maguindanao massacre? What can they do to help you in your efforts to make Maguindanao a good place in which to live?

Magudadatu: Never forget. Never forget what happened there. Keep talking about it, keep the story alive. Never let the government forget what it must do to ensure the delivery of justice. Keep us in your prayers. Remember our story so that it will not, cannot, happen again. Say no to impunity in whatever form.

DATELINE.PH: The Ampatuan clan is a known ally of the Arroyo administration. Now that administration is no longer in power, are you optimistic the Aquino administration will work toward ensuring that justice is served to the victims of the Maguindanao massacre?

Mangudadatu: If GMA were still in power, the Maguindanao massacre would be forgotten.

DATELINE.PH: Do you feel that former President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo is now paying her ‘karma’?

Mangudadatu: I believe that my answer to this question should remain off the record.